Because life keeps going and if we don't keep walking with it, where are we left?
I have been great at rolling with life and making the decisions that are best for me in the moment. I have walked away from a marriage that I was very unhappy in, I have moved countless times and I have completely changed my chosen career. I made it through the passing of my mom, the collapse of another very serious relationship, and the revamping of my chosen career.
Going through all of that change was not easy, but most of the time I was able to do it with joy in my heart and a smile on my face because I knew that I was strong, I could handle it and all I had to do was keep moving forward and making the best decisions for me that I could.
Interestingly I have been recently going through another phase of change and this time, even though it does not appear as extreme as some of the changes I have faced so far, this time I am struggling. To be blunt and frank and get straight to the point, I'm sad and I don't know why. I am completely unmotivated and have seemingly lost my drive to do, well, anything.
Today as I was driving (which I often am), I thought that maybe this is what depression feels like. An overwhelming sadness that has no source, that I can find anyway. It is pushing me to make a decision, to possibly make some changes. What those changes are, I'm not quite sure yet, but one thing I do know...
It is time to come back to me. It is time to do only what makes me happy and nothing else, it is time to re-embrace myself in all my glory, perceived faults and all and just put one foot in front of the other and continue to move forward. It is time to find the focus I desperately want and channel that focus into all the areas that are important to me, that help me to feel whole, balanced, and completely in love with myself.
How am I going to do that you ask.... well right now I am not sure, but this blog is step one. Why? because quite simply I love to write and it is time to let go of the fear of possible judgement on what I have written. To be honest, this blog is for me and if you read it, I thank you. If what I write about resonates with you, then I am blessed to have possibly made a difference, even if it is just that I have gotten you, the reader, thinking a little about the possibilities and the different perspectives out there.
Other than that, I am just going to take things one day at a time. I am going to make sure the choices I make are for me and fill my cup, so that I can also extend a hand to others who may be struggling. Even if it is just a simple smile on the street or a kind word at the right moment.
We are all walking our individual journeys and sometimes we feel stuck or unhappy and have no idea why. I personally think the best thing we can do for ourselves in those moments is to make sure we are being taken care of on all levels, and we are the only ones who can do this for ourselves. This may mean taking a few days for you, to do whatever it is that makes you happy on a base level. This might be daily walks in the woods or an evening bubble bath with candles and a glass of wine, or even getting back into that exercise routine that fell to the side when we got too busy.
Whatever it is for you, it's time to give back to yourself, it is time to fill your cup.
But hey, these are just one girls thoughts....
If you would like more information about Nicole and the services she offers please visit her website at www.intuitivebalance.ca
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